And it just continues.... I may have found my breaking point

So basically from the last time I left off, Steve apologized to me for that night. He claims how he thinks someone rufied (sp?) his drink b/c he doesn't remember a thing, including our conversation that night.

Whatever.

Lately, I don't know. I've become so damaged. My parents are driving me crazy and I am seriously about to commit myself to a psych ward because of them. My dad has been riding my ass about work, knowing that I am hating every moment of it there. He's been home since his accident, so he's just been annoying as hell. My mother busts all up into my room at random times. I was contemplating jacking off... It was about 1:00AM and I had just crawled into bed .. I had turned the TV on and had a music video going and then she just busts into my room to say "You're still up!? Go to bed." --- I'm like, if I had my cock out and gay porn on the TV ... what the fuck!?

Now today, my dad took my mom's car, since he's been stuck at home to go "out". No problem for him because he expects me to drive her all over. Luckily, we work at the same company, so instead of me doing what I wanted to do at lunch time, I had to drive her home, have lunch together and bullshit until the hour passed. I really didn't mind, but what pisses me off is that he just ASSUMES that it's ok and never asks me. Now they're talking about going to Connecticut to see about getting a deal on a car for my dad (my uncle works for a dealership) (my dad has a company truck, but he wants his own car) - so right away my mom is like "You have to go with us because if your father gets the car, I don't want to have to drive back from Connecticut by myself." --- AGAIN, assuming I have nothing to do, makes that demand ... I'm just so fucking tired of it!

Work has been atrocious. End of story there. I hate it and I want and I am looking for a new job.

School has been keeping me well beyond busy.

Money has been tight (what else is new?) and I am trying ever so hard to pay off all my bills.

I seriously had a moment where I was on the verge of breaking down and crying driving home from class, but I didn't. This coming week is spring break and everyone is talking about going away and posting on their Facebook pages where they're going ... Cancun here, Vegas there .. and here I am, stuck at home and at work with no means of vacation in the hindsight.

I seriously wanted to cry and as I was building up to it with all the thoughts in my head, I got a text message from my tax accountant with the amount of my return. I seriously did begin to cry with joy because of the amount I got back. I am so serious - It is really a light at the end of the tunnel. I can finally get rid of one of my major debts and actually start saving money toward something, like an apartment.

I can't tell you how happy it made me feel. I actually ended up by Steve last night. I kept begging him to go with me to eat at the diner and he refused. He insisted that I grab food and bring it to his place and we could eat and watch a movie. Of course, I ended up paying for the food, but I honestly didn't care, I was happy to get out of the house. No surprise, we didn't watch any movie because it got too late to start it by the time he actually got home. We just basically watched TV until midnight, when I finally left. As I was talking to him and I finally said good night, he's standing at the glass door, watching me walk to the street. As I had turned to walk away from the door, he called out my name and when I turn around, he whips out his cock completely and shakes it against the glass as I look down. I wasn't complaining, but I was like ... how fucked up ... you know I'm "curious" about that shit and you tease me like that!? LOL --- I was happy nonetheless... lol - oh and PS - talk about big and looooongggg!!! MMMMMmmmmmm ... LOL

I have been talking to him about going out tonight to get a drink or two, I seriously could use it after this week, but he's doing his usual shit again. He claims how he was laying low tonight because he has to get up early tomorrow to do something with his dad. He said he'd come over and then some girl messages him on FB about going to the exact place I asked him to go to and now he's like maybe we can go there... It's now 7:30 and I haven't a peep from him ... so I decided to leave it at that ... let him text me if anything and if not, then whatever.

I seriously have been a bitch this week. I've been so bitter and so negative. I picked up on it badly and I seriously need to stop, take a step back, reflect, and move on. I think I seriously need to look into doing some yoga or something ... I need to clear my mind and get a different perspective on life.... hm...