Strange dreams

So ... I have been having a lot of strange dreams lately. Some that I remembered and now have forgotten and one in particular that has stuck in my mind.

I had dreamed that I finally did it and came out. I have personally been contemplating the idea for much time now, but as always, had my reservations about doing just that.

Anyway, I dreamt (is that a word?) that I had announced my being gay to the family and the one person that I had expected to understand, did a full 180 on me! That person was my mom. Ok... since I can remember, my dad has been verbally against any of his children being gay. My dad is not a homophobe or anything of that nature, but for whatever reason, he has expressed that he'd disown his children if any were gay. My mom has verbally been open with the idea. She has said things such as, "so what? he should be able to love whomever he wants..." when I had "jokingly" suggested that I was gay.

So anyway... in my dream she was crying more than I had expected and had a really hard time hearing my coming out. She has said something like I'd be ridiculed by the family, gauked at by all, etc. etc. I was quite shocked and hurt and what's scary is that I vividly remember her response only ... not my dad's or anyone elses...

So strange... don't know what to make of it... any suggestions?